This is going to be part rant, part honest incomprehension, part discussion on the possibility of thing. If you can't stand those things, please leave, if you have answers, please comment, if you want to, please read on.
Ok, let's go.
--
Why is it always the older, slightly to very pudgy construction worker who takes his shirt of in very hot wheather and not the seventeen-to-twentyfive-year old ones who seem to be very content wearing a very thick fleece sweater? No, really, if I am going to be treated to the view of a half naked man from the subway (which is no skin of my back, I assure you) I want it to be a view of rippling abs and bouncy pecs. NOT rippling fat and bouncy moobs. Really, beyond my comprehension. I mean I realize the older one with the fat warms up swifter but still, doesn't solidarity count? I vote that should any construction worker take off his shirt, ALL construction workers take off their shirts. Yes this will mean that more pudgyness will ensue, but also more pec-age.
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I know some things about the human body, not much, but enough to get me, euh, by. So now I have a little scratch on the back of my left hand, with a little scabby bit over it. Now, when this scratch occured, not much happened, no real blood as such, just a bit of scratching. So why, when I now pick at the scab does there erupt a veritable geyser of blood?
Seriously, this is not even the size of a musquitobite, but when I just scratched at the freaking little bit of dried blood, it spurted, really, spurted. Let me say this again. SPURTED! There are now spots of fresh blood on the ceiling, honestly. Co-workers are as I type this trying to mop up the tsunami of blood that has come out of me. Why is this? Why?
Well, I know why they would be trying to clean up; blood is icky.
Should the "wound" not been healing underneath that little scab?
Seriously, dumbass bloodcells. How hard is it to design a mechanic like the body and then forgetting to get wounds to heal from the inside out instead of the other way round?
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Why is it that dreams can really fuck up your day? And really, they can. And I don't mean the big nightmarey "I was stuffed by 18 burly contruction workers and when I woke up my pillow was gone" type of thing, which isn't so much about the dream but about waking up in the wrong joke.
I mean the "I dreamt you ate my stake and I will be pissed of at you for the rest of the day" type of dream-annoyance. Some nights one can dream about kissing some random person on a bus and that day you will be suspiciously eyeing most eligible co-passengers on the public transport. Or not talk to your roommate for a few days because she admitted she dreamt she flushed your books through the toilet and you have never been able to trust her around your books again, really.
And the sad part is you do this, the hating, the eyeing, the everything, even though you KNOW, rationally, that it was only a dream.
Dreams are weird.
--
Ok, another public transport related one; I take the bus to work, and this bus is usually filled with the people you would expect to see in a bus at 7:50 in the morning, the collection of grey drabness with a pulse that greets shiny little me every morning is easily imagined.
Now, occasionally, there will be someone on the bus who draws the eyes, and even more rarely this might be someone who does so because he or she is simply very, very cute.
Now, whenever this happens I try to sit soI can get this little bit of niceness in my view. Not for ogling or leering, mind, just to pass over whenever I am not stuck in my book. I am a very visual person and facial beauty lifts my senses and makes my day a little bit better.
That being said, whenever I am in position, WHY is there always a person who finds the need to position themselves so that they block my view? WHY? Usually they stand right between me and the stuff even though there are multiple places to sit left and all.
They do it to spite me, I'm sure. It has occured to me to draw a connection between the fact that these people seem to be mean and spiteful, and the fact that they are almost without exception, extremely ugly.
And you know what, this works. Ugly people are spiteful. I should know, I am one, and if I see people prettier than me, I will do my best to ruin their day ;)
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I briefly touched upon this in my blog yesterday but it needs another mention.
I have friends, as do most people (and as undeserved as most, I'm sure), and sometimes these friends say or do things, as do most people, that makes a person want to take a spade to their lower intestine.
Now, on these "I could now rip off your head and dance a little jig in the fountain of blood your neck will have become" moments I usually find it prudent to mention my intention for grievious bodily harm. Not that I would directly begin to threathen or nothing, but still.
For example, I had a friend who had a tendency to make disparaging jokes about other people, usually something I can dish out and take, but as do most, I have my weak spots. One day, he managed to stumble upon one of these subjects, and I asked him, kindly, to not go there again.
Obviously, he ignored me and continued on the same line, so I asked him again. Nothing. In the end, I was forced to tell him that should he make one more joke on the subject, I would feel forced to break his nose.
And here is the thing I don't get. He says: "I would like to see you try."
WHY? Why do people do this? Because, you know, you really wouldn't. Nobody really likes to see a fist fly at their nose. And I am not kidding. As most people who know me can attest, I don't usually lie. I may exaggerate, I may make things a bit more colourful than they really were, but I don't usually lie.
So when I tell you that I will soon be doing my utmost to hurt you I will soon be doing my utmost to hurt you.
And I might not be the bestest fighter in the world, I will be able to land at least some points there, matey.
(By the way, sheer height and physical strength would make me quite the adversary, were it not for my debilitating fear of things flying at my face, which I think proves my point a bit)
Plus, I bite, and I am nasty. So if it would come to fisticuffs, you'd be damn sure I will walk of with scratches, bruises and parts of me in a cast, but YOU will walk away with teethmarks in places you would not like to explain to your girlfriend.
(I am not weird, I just tend to play mean when the chips are down(And I am weird))
So no, no you really would not want to see me try. Honestly. Plus, if I am forced to try something is wrong between us, which opens up a whole new can of worms.
--
Ongoing on the theme of "please trust me, I know this" why is it that whenever one tells a person that one really isn't a nice person and should perhaps be left alone, that the other person will NEVER believe this?
Really... I am not a very friendly person, I am emotionally unavailable, I fill my time with books and music, I am bitchy, strong-worded, whiney, needy and high maintenance. Whenever I say this to a date, he or she ALWAYS responds with something along the line of "you are just vulnerable and I can take what you have to give"
And really, when something like that is said there is nothing more to it than the woodchipper. Because from then on, I have been given freedom from responsibility. Do not come to my house three weeks later complaining that you have lost touch with your friends, your house has turned into an illegal nightclub and I am apparently in bed with your mother because I FREAKING WARNED YOU!
Truly. Be warned when I warn you, and feel safe when I tell you to feel safe. I know me, and I can judge my moods and effects of them better then you'll EVER be able to.
--
Hmmm, this blog has been in the making since the 20th of June (and I'm posting this on the 11th of July, even though it shows up for the 20th..), and I really can't think of anymore. So please, help me out, tell me about these things, tell me why...
(Anita Meyer be damned for all eternity to wander the globe in search of for the one decent Frans Bauer song for the torment of getting THAT SONG stuck in my head.)
Grtz,
Kevin.
Tuesday, June 20, 2006
Monday, May 22, 2006
Oh day of movies three.
Which was yesterday. I came back from London on Friday, and since the while trip put quite a drain on my resources I was forced to find a non-costly way to fill my time. Luckily, I have a monthly-renewed subscription to the public transport, a direct bus-connection to the nearest cinema, and a subscription to that one as well, so I can go and watch movies without any additional monetary strain. And, since my roommate found herself in the same situation, I didn’t have to go alone either. Shibby.
We watched three movies that had some been some time coming in watching. Mission Impossible 3, The DaVinci Code, and The Libertine. And really, they all sucked. Not all for the same reason or with the same intensity, but still. But to review them and still give people the opportunity to decide for themselves, one has to…euhm… what was I saying? Fuck “the people”, I have some things to say about these movies, yes.
Mission Impossible 3; Now I’ve never completely gotten the point of the whole M:I franchise thing, but then again, I’m not all that into action-movies anyways. I also don’t get why Tom Cruise is still being paid, but since he seems to produce most of his own movies now perhaps that is not such a difficult question to answer, I guess a good deal of the negotiations there were based on the “Want money? I’m in it then, so there” type of argument. Perhaps with some tongue-sticking-outage for good measure.
But, as far as action movies go, this one truly got on my tits. Now I don’t say that an action movie needs to have a good plot, good acting or intelligent behaviours in it, far from it really, I’ve watched and enjoyed “Krull” which should give anyone a good standard of how I feel about Action as a genre. This movie did NOT live up to those standards. This is saying something really.
We start of with a scene of Cruise (who is named Ethan in the movie but never mind, you’ll be thinking of him as Tom anyways) vs TheBadGuy (who probably had a name, Davian SomethingorotherbuthellbedeadsoonsonoworriesrememberingplusyoullbehappyhedoesntdothevoicehedidinCapoteanywayeventhoughyoudidntseeitcauseyoureculturallyretardedwhichIknowcauseyouarewatchingMI3andyesImtalkingaboutyoutooeventhoughyoudidseeCapotebutthatmustvebeenaflukecauseyourehere, I guess the credits named him) where TheBadGug (TBG from now on) threatens to shoot Tom’s wife. Now we all know this is a big no-no. Only the wife’s of James Bond are allowed to be killed, and then on the wedding night only. There are RULES here people. We don’t kill the pets, the kids (this rule should be revoked but is still in practice) or the wife unless we are in a revenge-type movie, or one of the aforementioned are part of the plot/aiding and abetting/generally established stupid. But because TBG is spouting off a lot of information not from the previous movie we already know the movie is going to be a flashback or “how did we get up to here”, and therefore most likely not going to be about revenge. TBG then proceeds to shoot the wife, leaving Tommyboy with a very classic One-Tear rolling from his right eye. Cut to opening credits.
Where we find out the woman who was just shot (or will be just have been shot (grammar licks differential timing’s cloven hoofs)) in the last scene to actually be Tom’s fiancé, which means she can safely be killed, anyone stupid enough to get engaged just before the start of or mentioning that fact during an action movie deserves to be killed. And Tom is a trainer of agents, one of which has been stupid enough to get herself caught. (damn, it is a revenge type movie, can’t we just go back to “trying to stop the maniac from destroying the Earth? I like the Earth, I think of it as Home, whereas I think of the person to be revenged as a word SOUNDING a bit like home, but with two less letters, and not meaning quite the same)
Rescueing ensues, which is botched because the to-be-rescued gets killed (in a fun way, by the way, but more on that later) and we are introduced to the standard team/band of heroes for this movie. The cute asian girl who is an expert on nearly everything but mostly on wearing clothes real nice, the nerdy Irishman with a penchant for fast moving flying objects, and the burly may or may not be black man with a gruff demeanor but a heart of gold.
So, stereotypes firmly in place, we go after the bad guy, which we do stupidly, but it still works, and we piss him off, after which he kidnaps our wife (they got married sneakily and swiftly, mostly because they both realised that only marriage would keep her from getting killed) and we go after him again, kill him, resolve a few interpersonal conflicts by ignoring them and we are ready for the next instalment of this drivelling maniacal cuntingness.
But in the meantime we get to see Tom get shot up the nose with a small explosive device that will fry his brains (the FUN way to go, not real painful and fast. If I were the bad guy I’d not invest in expensive small explosive but just crush his nads in a vice and shoot him in the head just before he passes out. No chance of a sequel there) we see the head of security being ineffectual; “Ma’am I’m gonna need you to stand back a bit, please, ma’am, stand back please, ma’am, would you mind stopping with the pouring wine all over my boss please, ma’am? Really I’m going to have to ask you not to tag him with this paging device if it is not too much of a hassle, ok, now I can handle you drugging him but really I would like you to stop bundling him to that there car now please ma’am? Ma’am? OH GOD THEY TOOK THE BOSS!!!!”
And a lot, a LOT of latex masks and shite to let people for no real reason look like other people.
So nothing new there.
Something that also has very little news to bring is The DaVinci Code. I mean, come on. The information from the book already wasn’t all that newsworthy, I know a lot of things most people didn’t know and I’ll admit it was presented well, even though bookwise it was so bad I nearly broke my personal dogma and almost heaved it mightily through the nearest window, but the movie is not going to be all exiting now is it, everybody in the entire world having have read the book after all? Plus, the information in the book might have been news to most Americans and the three people in Europe who’ve never heard of Catholicism, but really, watch Discovery Channel for a rainy Sunday afternoon and look up any words you
But I’d have to say, from a technically inferior book with a nice idea and a good deal of information they went to a technically very good film with nice action and unoriginal information. So in general I’d say it was a well done movie. It was stupid, but entertaining. Not going to go into it too deeply, it wasn’t all that interesting. Actually, on the bus drive home my roommate was at a loss to remember it in the line up of the movies we’d seen.
But see it, anyways, it was entertaining, and it is the movie people are going to be talking about, so it’d be a shame to see it.
And then, The Libertine. Johnny Depp as a cursing, shagging London Toff who pisses people off, is forgiven, pisses more people off, is forgiven, gets sick, pisses people off, gets forgiven and dies. End of freakin’ story.
Beautifully done movie, honestly, and most of the acting is superb, and there are some moments in the film that are truly moving, and with impressive lines. But the movie is depressing, god it is. And I think that most Depp-fans won’t like him that much with a face rotten of by syphilis… I enjoyed it though J smarmy little bastard. (I’m kidding, as an actor I think Depp has done some very fine work and will be able to do much more of the same, but sometimes it feels good to see someone attractive be destroyed by the consequences of their on ill-conceived actions)
Well, that’s it for now, I had some more to say about MI£ but since it’d have been just more of the same only with more cussing thrown in, I’ll spare you that much.
Off to next time,
Kind regards.
We watched three movies that had some been some time coming in watching. Mission Impossible 3, The DaVinci Code, and The Libertine. And really, they all sucked. Not all for the same reason or with the same intensity, but still. But to review them and still give people the opportunity to decide for themselves, one has to…euhm… what was I saying? Fuck “the people”, I have some things to say about these movies, yes.
Mission Impossible 3; Now I’ve never completely gotten the point of the whole M:I franchise thing, but then again, I’m not all that into action-movies anyways. I also don’t get why Tom Cruise is still being paid, but since he seems to produce most of his own movies now perhaps that is not such a difficult question to answer, I guess a good deal of the negotiations there were based on the “Want money? I’m in it then, so there” type of argument. Perhaps with some tongue-sticking-outage for good measure.
But, as far as action movies go, this one truly got on my tits. Now I don’t say that an action movie needs to have a good plot, good acting or intelligent behaviours in it, far from it really, I’ve watched and enjoyed “Krull” which should give anyone a good standard of how I feel about Action as a genre. This movie did NOT live up to those standards. This is saying something really.
We start of with a scene of Cruise (who is named Ethan in the movie but never mind, you’ll be thinking of him as Tom anyways) vs TheBadGuy (who probably had a name, Davian SomethingorotherbuthellbedeadsoonsonoworriesrememberingplusyoullbehappyhedoesntdothevoicehedidinCapoteanywayeventhoughyoudidntseeitcauseyoureculturallyretardedwhichIknowcauseyouarewatchingMI3andyesImtalkingaboutyoutooeventhoughyoudidseeCapotebutthatmustvebeenaflukecauseyourehere, I guess the credits named him) where TheBadGug (TBG from now on) threatens to shoot Tom’s wife. Now we all know this is a big no-no. Only the wife’s of James Bond are allowed to be killed, and then on the wedding night only. There are RULES here people. We don’t kill the pets, the kids (this rule should be revoked but is still in practice) or the wife unless we are in a revenge-type movie, or one of the aforementioned are part of the plot/aiding and abetting/generally established stupid. But because TBG is spouting off a lot of information not from the previous movie we already know the movie is going to be a flashback or “how did we get up to here”, and therefore most likely not going to be about revenge. TBG then proceeds to shoot the wife, leaving Tommyboy with a very classic One-Tear rolling from his right eye. Cut to opening credits.
Where we find out the woman who was just shot (or will be just have been shot (grammar licks differential timing’s cloven hoofs)) in the last scene to actually be Tom’s fiancé, which means she can safely be killed, anyone stupid enough to get engaged just before the start of or mentioning that fact during an action movie deserves to be killed. And Tom is a trainer of agents, one of which has been stupid enough to get herself caught. (damn, it is a revenge type movie, can’t we just go back to “trying to stop the maniac from destroying the Earth? I like the Earth, I think of it as Home, whereas I think of the person to be revenged as a word SOUNDING a bit like home, but with two less letters, and not meaning quite the same)
Rescueing ensues, which is botched because the to-be-rescued gets killed (in a fun way, by the way, but more on that later) and we are introduced to the standard team/band of heroes for this movie. The cute asian girl who is an expert on nearly everything but mostly on wearing clothes real nice, the nerdy Irishman with a penchant for fast moving flying objects, and the burly may or may not be black man with a gruff demeanor but a heart of gold.
So, stereotypes firmly in place, we go after the bad guy, which we do stupidly, but it still works, and we piss him off, after which he kidnaps our wife (they got married sneakily and swiftly, mostly because they both realised that only marriage would keep her from getting killed) and we go after him again, kill him, resolve a few interpersonal conflicts by ignoring them and we are ready for the next instalment of this drivelling maniacal cuntingness.
But in the meantime we get to see Tom get shot up the nose with a small explosive device that will fry his brains (the FUN way to go, not real painful and fast. If I were the bad guy I’d not invest in expensive small explosive but just crush his nads in a vice and shoot him in the head just before he passes out. No chance of a sequel there) we see the head of security being ineffectual; “Ma’am I’m gonna need you to stand back a bit, please, ma’am, stand back please, ma’am, would you mind stopping with the pouring wine all over my boss please, ma’am? Really I’m going to have to ask you not to tag him with this paging device if it is not too much of a hassle, ok, now I can handle you drugging him but really I would like you to stop bundling him to that there car now please ma’am? Ma’am? OH GOD THEY TOOK THE BOSS!!!!”
And a lot, a LOT of latex masks and shite to let people for no real reason look like other people.
So nothing new there.
Something that also has very little news to bring is The DaVinci Code. I mean, come on. The information from the book already wasn’t all that newsworthy, I know a lot of things most people didn’t know and I’ll admit it was presented well, even though bookwise it was so bad I nearly broke my personal dogma and almost heaved it mightily through the nearest window, but the movie is not going to be all exiting now is it, everybody in the entire world having have read the book after all? Plus, the information in the book might have been news to most Americans and the three people in Europe who’ve never heard of Catholicism, but really, watch Discovery Channel for a rainy Sunday afternoon and look up any words you
But I’d have to say, from a technically inferior book with a nice idea and a good deal of information they went to a technically very good film with nice action and unoriginal information. So in general I’d say it was a well done movie. It was stupid, but entertaining. Not going to go into it too deeply, it wasn’t all that interesting. Actually, on the bus drive home my roommate was at a loss to remember it in the line up of the movies we’d seen.
But see it, anyways, it was entertaining, and it is the movie people are going to be talking about, so it’d be a shame to see it.
And then, The Libertine. Johnny Depp as a cursing, shagging London Toff who pisses people off, is forgiven, pisses more people off, is forgiven, gets sick, pisses people off, gets forgiven and dies. End of freakin’ story.
Beautifully done movie, honestly, and most of the acting is superb, and there are some moments in the film that are truly moving, and with impressive lines. But the movie is depressing, god it is. And I think that most Depp-fans won’t like him that much with a face rotten of by syphilis… I enjoyed it though J smarmy little bastard. (I’m kidding, as an actor I think Depp has done some very fine work and will be able to do much more of the same, but sometimes it feels good to see someone attractive be destroyed by the consequences of their on ill-conceived actions)
Well, that’s it for now, I had some more to say about MI£ but since it’d have been just more of the same only with more cussing thrown in, I’ll spare you that much.
Off to next time,
Kind regards.
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